Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
