Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
