If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
