Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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