if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
