i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
