i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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