She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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