is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
