Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize