trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
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