i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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