she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
