there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
