Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I have feelings that need drinking.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
