Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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