I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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