Are we in a gay sports bar?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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