Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
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somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
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Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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