This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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