This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize