Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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