Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize