My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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