so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
