She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
