omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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