there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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