shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
