Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
