Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go? http://tfl.nu/synh
  Replies (12) Good night (745) Bad night (2397)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her http://tfl.nu/2g5w
  Replies (12) Good night (1052) Bad night (4253)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in http://tfl.nu/i6mo
  Replies (13) Good night (3390) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer... http://tfl.nu/txcz
  Replies (20) Good night (4551) Bad night (954)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender? http://tfl.nu/l1y7
  Replies (12) Good night (4295) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics" http://tfl.nu/bnvl
  Replies (6) Good night (1139) Bad night (3915)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her. http://tfl.nu/fyts
  Replies (7) Good night (4180) Bad night (1583)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven http://tfl.nu/wd21
  Replies (3) Good night (2349) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?

  (1-708): View more from Illinois

  head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower? (1-708): head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way http://tfl.nu/d98n
  Replies (2) Good night (1542) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night? http://tfl.nu/7e2i
  Replies (2) Good night (1069) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus http://tfl.nu/kps3
  Replies (3) Good night (546) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him. http://tfl.nu/bezf
  Replies (18) Good night (1831) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex... http://tfl.nu/9y7e
  Replies (6) Good night (742) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS http://tfl.nu/rllj
  Replies (3) Good night (423) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat? http://tfl.nu/9elv
  Replies (6) Good night (660) Bad night (335)

Randomize