She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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