also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
