you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
