My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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