She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize