yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Found your dick twin last night
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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