So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
only if we run a train.
done.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
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