I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
birth control should be required to get into college
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
