office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
