why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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