Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
