Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm getting married
To pizza
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
