I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
