Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
