I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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