I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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