And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Your penis caused this!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
