we have officially mastered the walk of shame
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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