do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
